"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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