i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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