im drinking this country out of the recession.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
