Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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