i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Randomize