just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
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Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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