scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
