I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
