Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Don't tell me you're on acid again
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
