If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
