Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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