dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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