last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
