First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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