Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
