she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
