Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
