What a fucking waste of an outfit
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
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