I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
