i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Randomize
