Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
