my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
