At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Fuck appropriateness.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Randomize
