She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
