let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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