he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize