we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Randomize
