This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
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I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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