Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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