remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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