FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
