Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
