Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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