just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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