I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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