Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
