I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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