i wish starbucks made bloody marys
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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