The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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