Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
