all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I FOUND THE LEGS
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
