Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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