yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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