did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize