just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
