So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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