i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
