Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
