I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
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Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
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At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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