I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
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