Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
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