ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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